I’m all for searching out signs and wonders in this curious world of ours, but some days life’s weirdness goes a little far. Like today, for instance.

I was enjoying my day off today, drinking coffee and paying bills today at our kitchen table (Woo hoo! Isn’t life grand?!) when out of the corner of my eye I caught a blur of movement. What was that? I wondered, and then I remembered that I live in the middle of Squirrel Disney World, thanks to the big oak trees towering above our house. (You’re welcome to come visit, but I suggest you bring a hard hat.)

Nothing to see here, I thought. It’s just a squirrel. Back to work. But since I couldn’t find the stamps, I paused to watch the little guy turn an acorn around and around and around, as if trying to find the price tag.

“Hi squirrel,” I said.

I promise you that I spoke to the squirrel completely non-nonchalantly, without a hint of malice. I am a squirrel lover, not a hater. (Well, except for that bird feeder incident, but I have since forgiven them and moved on, mostly.)

But do you know what that squirrel did? First he froze, staring at me, and then he jerked his head forward and peered his beady eyes INTO MY SOUL. And then I swear to you that he put the acorn down, stood on his hind legs, and BEAT BOTH HIS SQUIRREL FISTS AGAINST THE GLASS OF OUR BACK DOOR, as if to say, “STOP YOUR GAWKING AT ME! A LITTLE PRIVACY, PLEASE?”

“Okay, okay,” I said, and went to find the stamps.

I may live here, but apparently the squirrels are in charge.